I. The amount of loyalists in the entire American Population in 1776 that remained loyal to the crown was only 1/5.
--A. The loyalists saw the patriots as unscrupulous, violent, self-interested men who only want power for themselves. They didn't really appreciate the bonds with the British and the protection and trade. They wanted everything separate and secluded to only themselves.
----1. The patriots tried so hard to persuade Britain into separating with their declarations and letters.
-------2. Loyalists were so angry about the publishing of the Declaration of Independence in 1776 that 547 New York loyalists signed and circulated the Declaration of Dependence.
II. Loyalists saw the break with Britain a threat to trade and said that war would damage their ties.
--A. The patriots wanted full respect from the British, but loyalists saw it as selfishness.
----1. “That the enjoyment of Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness are essential rights which every Government ought to respect and preserve.”
- You are the only one so far to provide some kind of a tag as to your position, ie "I am a loyalist..." so thank you for that!
- The outline seems to be a little distanced. Granted, it is serving as a synthesis of your material at this point but I want to see you start switching the language over to a more personal one, ie "I believe blah blah..."
- Numbers and letters should be lined up, so the A2 needs to be in line with A1.
- The only source here is from the Avalon Project, and you don't have parenthetic citation in your outline yet.
1 comment:
- You are the only one so far to provide some kind of a tag as to your position, ie "I am a loyalist..." so thank you for that!
- The outline seems to be a little distanced. Granted, it is serving as a synthesis of your material at this point but I want to see you start switching the language over to a more personal one, ie "I believe blah blah..."
- Numbers and letters should be lined up, so the A2 needs to be in line with A1.
- The only source here is from the Avalon Project, and you don't have parenthetic citation in your outline yet.
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